This is a
work of fiction. I love getting email so
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From
Chapter 18:
I look up and smile at Pete and say to Jase. “You look very nice. You goin to bed
or…………I look at my watch. You got like
twenty minutes that you can still watch television.”
He
screams. “TV, Dad!” He pulls us both to the family room and gets
Pete and I to sit next each other while he climbs up
and sprawls over both of us. I glance at
Pete and notice that he’s got like this weird look on his face, like a really
emotional look but I can’t for the life of me figure out why. He sees me looking and I lift one eyebrow in
an unspoken question. He shakes his head
which either means that he doesn’t want to talk about it, it isn’t anything to
begin with, he doesn’t want to talk about it in front of Jase
or god only know what the fuck else.
Finally Jase skips off to the safety of
Alan’s big green paws and I turn to Pete.
“You okay?”
The Good Doctor
By Terry Audette
Chapter 19
Pete takes a
deep breath and then lays his head against the back of the sofa and stares for
a moment at the ceiling.
“I had a
patient ask me about us today. Well…….he didn’t really know that we were an us he had just seen
us together at the mall and he asked me about you, asked if you were a doctor
too.”
Uh oh, this can’t be good. “He
thought that I was a doctor?” Nobody had
EVER made that mistake before. My god, a doctor of what?
Pete smiled
and then wrapped his arm around my head and pulled it to his shoulder. He laughed.
“I didn’t know what to tell him.
I mean should I tell him that I’m gay and that
you’re my lover? Should I just let him
believe that you’re a straight buddy, a casual
friend? For a minute I
was like frozen, you know, all the old, don’t tell anyone that you’re gay crap
was running through my head………and then I thought of Jase……how
he hugs me really hard before he goes to bed each night and I thought how crazy
this was……how crazy that I was even thinking about pretending that this didn’t
exist.…that this wasn’t the most important thing in my life.”
Pete reached
over with his left hand and pulled my legs up onto the sofa
and simultaneously stretched out next to me with his left leg between my legs
and the side of his face resting lightly on my left shoulder. His left hand was gently cradling the right
side of my face, he spoke softly with a husky
intimacy.
“I want us to
do something………..I dunno…………ahhhhhh, public I guess.
Would that freak you out?”
“Public?” I lifted my head
and whispered. “You mean like sex?” Okay, so it takes me a minute to catch the drift.
Pete closed
his eyes and groaned. “Eric, I think
that your office in the warehouse is probably about as public as we need to
get……………well………..unless maybe we go camping or
something.” Camping? “No, what I meant was……………well………..I know
that we’ve only been together for a few months but we both know how we feel
about each other and I think that we should make it official, or at least
public.” He lifted his head and looked
down at me. “So whadya
think? More than you wanna get into?
Am I being pushy?” He stared at
me for a while. “Eric? Whadya think?”
“You mean
like a commitment ceremony? Yeah, that’d
be good.” I rolled slightly towards him
and buried my face in his neck. “What
kind of a camping trip were you thinking about? I mean where would we go where it would still
be a camping trip and still be somehow public?”
Okay so this is like a semi-sick fantasy of mine.
Pete slid his
mouth over my face until our lips met and his tongue pushed into my mouth. Commitment. Commitment! Commitment?
I broke the
kiss. “Where would we do it?”
Pete smiled
at me. “We talking
camping sex or commitment ceremony?”
“Commitment. It seems like we
got three choices if we’re thinking of an at home kinda thingy. Either we do it here, at your mom’s or at my parent’s
house. If we do it at my mom’s we got a
nutcase on our hands and if we do it at your mom’s we end up with the same
nutcase just moved to a different location.”
“Eric, you’re
being unfair. I’ve never seen your
mother behave like that.”
“Yeah, I
know. She still wants to make a good
impression on you. Believe me, in a year
or so she’s gonna be telling
you how to treat your patients. But the
lunches will be great.” I disentangled
our legs and straddled his hips while my head was lying on his chest and his
cock was getting hard under my butt.
Pete put his
hand on the back of my neck and kissed the top of my head. “So you’re okay with this?”
So am I?
How the fuck do I know! I do know
that I love him and not just some kinda
half-assed love but the total real thing.
The thing is that there are some things that you gotta
be ready for even when you’re maybe not totally sure. Some things you just have to say, “Sure I can
do that!”, even when you’re not really positive. And that’s not even
taking into consideration the whole Jase thing. Cause it’s like I’m
saying yes for him too and it’s a decision that he’s gotta live with for a long
time.
I lift my
head and look into his eyes. There’s no deceit in those eyes, there’s kindness,
intelligence and something more, what my Grandpa Corsini
used to call a standup guy. That’s the best description of Pete, a standup guy. Not to mention that something else would be
standing straight up if I wasn’t sitting on it.
I smile down
at him. “Yep.”
-----------------------------------
I finish my
laps and swim over to where Jase is sitting at the
edge of the pool with his feet in the water.
“How many, Kiddo?”
Jase holds up his fingers but they bear no relation to the figure he
gives me. “I think fifteen, Dad.” That sounds about right. “Can I swim now, Dad?”
I hold out my
arms and Jase takes a firm hold of my hands and then
jumps in and wraps his arms around my neck and lies
against my chest as I swim backwards.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, Dad.” The water is like
warm silk and swirls around us. His
black hair is plastered to his head and he’s blinking
away the water.
“Wanna try swimming on your own?”
“Okay.” He looks worried. “You’re not gonna
just let go of me are ya?”
“Nope, my
arms will be pretty much around you all the time but just enough so that you
don’t sink. If you can
swim on your own that’d be best though.”
I gently
pulled Jase’s arms from around my neck and positioned
him so that both of my arms were under his outstretched body as he began trying
to swim. Of course
I don’t know what I’m doing! This is
just the way that my dad did it with me.
There’s not all that many things that I’m really good at but
swimming is one of them. I swim
backwards under Jase and ahead of him. He seems to feel freer and if he sinks he’ll just land on me.
We make it about half of the length of the pool and then Jase is getting that, I’m worn out get me the hell outta here, look on his face and I scoop him up and walk to
the end of the pool and climb out with him in my arms.
He’s breathing strongly and I whisper in his ear. “You did good,
Kiddo!”
“I did, Dad,
didn’t I? I was swimming, Dad!” Jase is so mine
right now, I mean at this age. I know
that he won’t stay this way and that makes this time
with him all the more important.
We shower
together and wash off the chlorine. I
dry him off and comb his hair. The other
guys at the gym keep coming over to say what a nice
boy he is and how much he looks like me.
In the car Jase throws his arms around my
neck and tells me that he loves me. It’s one of those little boy declarations that appear
suddenly for no apparent reason except the joy of being alive. I pull him against me and kiss the side of
his head.
“I love you
too, Kiddo.” I want to talk to him about
the commitment ceremony. I want to know
how he feels about it, how he feels about Pete and I
in general and if he wants to be a part of it.
“Soooooo, Jase.” I ruffle his hair. “You know how much I like Pete don’t
ya?” He knows nothing of non-sequitors and I add quickly. “Well, you like him too. You told me that, right?”
“Yeah, Dad, I
like Pete a lot!”
“Well, the
thing is, Jase, that I like Pete in kind of a special
adult way.” Then
quickly. “He likes me too…………..in that way.” We’re still in the parking lot of the gym and I finally put
the key in the ignition. “And the thing
is that when you like somebody like that you want everyone to know……………..well, at least your family and your friends.”
Jase has gotten a kinda
worried look on his face and says. “Do
you still like me, Dad?”
I pull Jase over to me so that he’s
sitting on my lap. I run my fingers
through his hair and stare into his eyes.
“You’re my son………………my little boy.
I love you more than anything, more than
anyone, more than myself. That won’t ever, ever change, Jase. No matter what happens between Pete and me or
between me and anyone, the one thing that won’t ever
change is how much I love you.
Understand?”
Jase nod solemnly. “Does Pete
like me too?” He likes to cover all
bases.
“Jase, Pete loves you!
He loves you just like you were his own little
boy. That why we want you to be part of
this……well, this kinda party
that we’re gonna give. It’s just a thing where we tell everybody how
much we like each other and then we get to eat a really good dinner.” I can’t help
it. I’m Italian
and food is really a big deal to me.
----------------------------
My dad has a
den, or, well, an office, you maybe could even call it a library. Anyway the totally
cool thing about it is that my mom never, absolutely never, goes in there. This all came about because of her wildass cleaning of the office twenty years ago when she
not only cleaned it but tossed out a lotta things
that looked like crap to her but that my dad treasured. The result? A sanctuary. A mom free zone! Apparently there was
a knock down battle with threats of divorce flying. Mom now treats this room like
it no longer exists in her house.
My dad is
sitting in his ratty old recliner that’s surrounded by
a spreading pool of old and older Field & Stream magazines. The walls are lined
with bookshelves filled with every conceivable type of book and dozens upon
dozens of little things that have meaning only for my dad and, well, maybe
me. Things like the lure that he caught
his nineteen-pound Northern Pike on, and the ticket stubs from the first ball
game that he took me to. If I leave Jase anything I want it to be this room. Nothing else in the world will tell him more
about his Grandfather than this room.
“You look
good, Dad.” Geez,
he looks like crap!
He looks at
me for a moment, raises one eyebrow and smiles.
“Thanks, Son. The doc says that
I’m doin fine….all things considered.”
There’s an old leather side chair next to his desk and I pull it
over I close as I can get to his recliner without having to kick aside
magazines.
“You walkin okay, Dad?”
“As long as I take my pills.”
He’s got a drill bit in his hand and he’s
turning it over and over. “They seem to
help.” His glasses are down near the end
of his nose and he’s looking at me over them.
Sometimes my
dad is really easy to talk to and we just fall into
this rhythm of conversation and it’s really great but other times, like now,
it’s like I’m dragging every word out of him.
He knows somehow that I’m here to talk about
something that he doesn’t want to hear or at least that he doesn’t want to have
to discuss. Why is it that I always feel
like I’m ten years old when I’m around him?
“Dad……………” But he interrupts me.
“Your mother
told me about the ceremony.” That drill
bit just keeps turning in his hand.
Oh! Is this good or bad? Maybe it’s that he’s
so English/Irish and I take sooooo after the Italian
side of the family, it’s like there’s this gulf. It’s not that he doesn’t love me because I absolutely
know that he does and I love him but well it’s like I want, even need, to be
physical, to touch and that’s something that Dad’s not good at. With Jase, even if I’m mad at him and telling him that he’s done something
wrong, I’m always touching him, holding him, letting him know by my physical
touch that I’m there for him.
“Ma
did?” How the hell
does she know? I purposely didn’t talk to her about this because I wanted to talk to
Dad first. She’s
probably got the freakin house bugged!
I gave a
short laugh. “I’m surprised……………..surprised that she even knew.” I was chewing on my thumbnail. He was smiling.
“Jason……he’s an innocent, at least when it comes to your mother’s
questioning.” Shit! It’s not like I can
tell him not to talk to his grandmother.
“Ahhhhhhhhh so,” I inhaled deeply, “how do you feel about
it?” I don’t
like the way that this is going at all.
“Well, at
first I thought that it was a bad idea.”
He saw the look that I must have had on my face and hurried on. “Now calm down, I
said that was what I thought at first but the more I thought about that the
more that I realized that what I really had bouncing around in my brain was the
thought that maybe you would still turn out to be straight and I didn’t want
you to jump into anything that might stop that.
Dumb, huh?”
I was
beginning to get aggravated. “I’m not
straight, Dad!”
He waved me
down into my chair. “Calm down, Eric, I
know. And though
you may not totally believe me, it’s fine with me that you aren’t. That is after all, who you are. The problem here has never been who or what
you are. The problem has been with my
thinking on it.”
“Really?” I didn’t expect this. He’s not normally like this.
Normally I’m to blame………..for something.
“Course
you’re gonna go to hell……but……I
guess there’s not much that we can do about that now.”
“Dad!!!!” He’s laughing. Laughing!
“Kidding, Eric! Good
Lord, Son, you got no sense of humor at all.”
Stroke? Heart attack? Stroke? Heart attack?
-----------------------------------
“They’re all
crazy!”
Pete pushed
my hair off of my forehead and kissed me. “I’ll take care of you, Babe.” He moved his right leg up between my legs
until my balls are resting gently on his upper leg. We were lying in bed and turned towards each
other, his right hand was moving steadily over my body, light touches,
reassuring.
“I mean she’s
nuts in her way and he’s nuts in his way and they’re both nuts in different
ways. A person doesn’t know which way to
turn.” I push my forehead against his
shoulder and he licks the side of my neck.
Ummmmmm. We’ve had sex so
many times this week that my cock hurts and my butt feels like it’s…..well…..gotten
a lot of attention.
Pete pulls me
close and then rolls slowly onto his back pulling me along and I curl up with
my head on his chest and his left arm around my shoulders. He kisses the top of my head. “You can always turn to me.”
“My mom wants
to cook for the commitment ceremony. She
wants us to have it here. God only knows
what she’s planning!”
Pete’s thumb
is gently rubbing the back of my neck.
“Well………..is there gonna
be that many people to cook for? I mean
I guess that I hadn’t thought about it.”
“There’s your
mom and dad and my mom and dad and, of course, Jase.” I moved my left leg over Pete’s right. “But…….I mean the
thing is, if you’re gonna have this ceremony it seems
to me the whole point of it is to let as many of your friends and associates
know as possible. Like the people at
your clinic, shouldn’t they know, shouldn’t they be invited?” God! Did this mean the people from my office
too? I mean they know that I’m gay and they know that Pete and I are lovers; it’s just
that who the hell wants to see em when you don’t have
to. “Have you talked to your mom about
it?”
I could hear
Pete thinking. “No……………………but she’s gonna wanna bring my Aunt Grace
too…………….and maybe a few others.”
Is this whole
thing going to be embarrassing? I got a
feeling that maybe it is, well…………..on some level
anyway. For one thing, Pete’s Aunt Grace
is like a society type, something I definitely am not. You might even say that I’m
an anti-society type. Well, there is an antidote who’s just choppin
at the bit.
I lift my
head and look at Pete who I can’t really see anyway
because it’s dark. “Pete………..why don’t we just let my mom take care of the whole
thing? She’s
dying to do it and it’ll make it a hell of a lot easier on us. Besides neither one of us has the time it’ll
take to do justice to this.” One of the
advantages of mom is that she has a way of kinda molding things to the way that she likes em.
I gently
thrust my cock against Pete’s leg and kiss his chin. “Whadya think?”
Pete pulls my
face to his and buries his tongue in my mouth while he slowly rolls me over and
pushes my legs apart with his. He murmurs
into my mouth. “Yeah, Babe……..that’s fine.”